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| Much like the quatrains of Nostradamus, the verses of "Diana"
take some interpreting. Because of the three line, eight syllable form,
there's not much room for sloppy writing. Think of it as Rock and Roll
haiku.
There's a lot of information and "in" jokes if you're an ardent Diana admirer. In fact, the only people who'll understand all of the verses without reading this explanation are also the ones who are likely to be "royally pissed" at it. Poetic License Applied For. |
RealAudio
(dual ISDN stereo)
RealAudio (ISDN stereo) RealAudio (28.8 stereo) RealAudio (2.0 compatible) RealAudio (2.0 compatible) small Wave file CD 44.1kHz stereo |
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DIANA
| Die, Diana
(to the tune of Dayenu) |
"Dayenu" -a traditional Passover song
Dayenu in Hebrew is pronounced "Die-Ay-New". The chorus of "Diana" is easy to mistake for "Dayenu". The verses follow the same form as Dayenu, with a few variations. |
| Cinderella's just a wish,
your
Marriage loveless, royal issue Can't send roses, only tissue Diana |
Marrying the guy with big ears isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Your kids,/ when you locked yourself in the bathroom, slipped kleenex under the door since they didn't have something more appropriate like roses. (As reported in the tabloids.) |
| Regal figure, drop-by, dash
in
Children, land mines, AIDS, compassion As a virtue or just fashion? Diana |
The work of a princess is never done. |
| Which one is your best admirer
Dodi, Charles, the sons you sire Or the National Enquirer? Diana |
Who loved you best?/ The guy you were squished with (Dodi Fayed), Prince Charles, your two sons, /or the tabloids? |
| Con-spir-a-tor-i-al-ly speaking
Wedding Dodi's havoc wreaking Careful of whose nose your tweaking Diana |
Conspiracy theory:/ If Diana had married Mr. Fayed, a man with close ties to those ruling Egypt, the future king of England would have quite an inappropriate step-daddy./ Would the royals or MI5 kill to prevent this? |
| People, Newsweek, cover shots,
we
Crave your beauty, wealth, your thoughts, we Hunt you down with paparazzi Diana |
They shoot photos, don't they? |
| They, the cameras, watch how
you dress
You, the princess, hide from the press We, the public, love you to death Diana |
Love you to death and then some... |
| Enter tunnel at the red line
Fleeing journalistic deadline Once again, a front page headline Diana |
With the motor floored,/ trying to get away from the press,/ you still make the news. |
| (Mer)cedes speeding like a
comet
Little princes lose their mom, it's Bigger press than royal vomit Diana |
Fast car,/ bye Di. /
The biggest story in the tabloids prior to her death involved her bulemia. Bulemics barf to stay thin. |
| Lovely rings that Dodi's buying
(Newest lover, Harrod's scion) Photo op of bloodstains drying Diana |
Di's guy, Dodi Fayed, had just purchased rings, theoretically to wed
her soon. /
His family owns Harrod's, the famous department store in Britain./ A chance for photos. |
| Jackals of the press they
fle-ed
Drinking driver, too much spe-ed Char-i-ots of Fire, inde-ed Diana |
Racing away from photographers/ too high and too fast /
It seems ironic that Dodi Fayed produced the 1981 "Best Picture" Academy Award winning movie "Chariots of Fire". |
| Inbred royals always bicker
wish the funeral was quicker Driver couldn't hold his liquor Diana |
"We are not amused."/ The original funeral procession was tripled in length after a public outcry. One report had the old lady in the funny hat quoted as saying Diana shouldn't even be in that church./ With a Blood Alcohol Content of 0.18 it's pretty impressive the driver could get the car up to 100mph before running into something. |
|
If tabloid news has caused
your death, then
|
So everyone wants to blame "those sleazy rags"/ and piously say "how
terrible" /
...and then race to the television and newspapers for unnecessary details. |
| Hollywood's on your bandwagon
Blame press for chauffeur's zigzagging Blood tests showed he'd drunk a flagon Diana |
Then the movie stars started saying that it's been happening forever and it was only a matter of time until someone was killed./ Because "those nasty photgraphers" on motorcycles somehow can cause a three ton armored Mercedes to swerve madly at over a hundred miles per hour. / Even though in any other situation it'd be pretty obvious that driving at triple digit speeds while very drunk and not wearing a seatbelt was a bad idea. |
| Endless footage on the TV
Making everybody greedy Like this song? Then buy our CD! Diana |
Hey, where'd the reruns of Gilligan's Island go?/
Hey, how can I cash in on Diana's death? Hey, look! Severe Tire Damage condoms, matches, tattoos, t-shirts, and Compact Discs! |
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Severe Tire Damage (band@std.org) |  |